A New Year, a New You?

Its 2018!   Happy NEW YEAR!

What does this year hold for you?

Did you set your intentions?  Are they realistic and obtainable?

If you haven’t set them yet, it is ok, you have 365 days to set them.  But I want you to be realistic about them, think deep about what you want and ask the Universe to help you.  Then let it go…out into the Universe and start working towards it.

Fitness and losing weight is always a big one for people.  Do you want to lose a few pounds?  Have you figured out how you will do this?  Did you go online and research diet and exercise plans or did you hire a wellness coach to help you?

Career and money.  Are you wanting/needing a new job.  Do you want to change fields? Have you decided how you are going to achieve this?  Did you start networking?  Have you put yourself out there on LinkedIn?  Have you started your job search?  How about taking some classes online?

Love.  This is a tough one as we never know when love is going to walk into our lives.  I would love to say you will log onto your dating app and the perfect man will be right there.  Hey, you never know, that could happen, but odds are…it won’t.  So what will you do to attract your perfect partner this year?  Will you try different or multiple dating apps?  Ask your friends to set you up?  Go out more?  Sure this is good but honestly the best advice I can give you is to love yourself.  Love yourself so much that the energy you would normally put into finding someone goes right back into yourself.  That energy will fuel you to do the other things on your resolution list like lose weight, advance your career, change career paths, meet fitness goals, etc.

I read something lately that said “be the person you want to date”.  We all know that we are a mirror (see my blog Holding up the mirror).  If you are insecure, sad, lonely, feel abandoned….that is what you will attract.  However, on the flip side, if you are confident, content, happy, fulfilled, successful and have a great life….what do you think will happen…you will attract that same person.

Another article I read asked “if you met the male version of yourself, would you date him”.  BRILLIANT question.  6 months ago I would have said NO WAY.  But today, I say, oh yah, for sure I would.  I would be proud to date someone like me.

What’s the difference in me from 6 months ago.  Everything.  I changed my story.  I got divorced, moved, worked hard in trauma therapy, I went to school to be a coach so I could help others, I focused on me, my kids, my career and started creating the life I wanted to have.  I simply started making small changes in myself that started shifting my vibration which ultimately led me to manifesting, naturally.

Loving myself was hard work, there were days I wanted to give up and go back to the way I was because I was comfortable with the misery.  Knowing what to expect, even if it was unhealthy, was less scary than the unknown.   But then I started seeing the growth in myself and the benefit of all the work, remember small victories make for large ones later.  Always recognize and celebrate the small victories.  Like sleeping through the night, eating full meals, going a day without crying, etc.  Those seem small, but they are huge.

So, my point is, loving yourself, truly loving who you are makes all the difference in the world.  That is a hard concept for me to teach, you just have to trust and start small.  For me, the first thing I chose to do was overcome my fear of being alone by forcing myself….to be alone.  It’s easy to surround ourselves with people and things and to keep ourselves so busy that we don’t have to deal with our problems or past issues.  Its easy to delve into a new relationship because it feels good and it allows us to ignore the empty void inside us.  Until the shiny new relationship doesn’t feel so good anymore and it becomes work, like any relationship, and then we are forced to look inward and admit that we are repeating the same cycle over and over.

I tell my friends, family and clients all the time that you can “stuff” your problems for only so long until eventually the pain oozes out in some area of your life and shows itself as stress, depression, anxiety, addiction, etc.  You can run, but you can’t hide.   Your issues will always be there.  However, if you take the time to be with yourself and tackle these issues one at a time, the outcome will be incredible.

At this point, once you have become the person you want to be, that will be when you attract healthy things and people into your life.  It is a process, it is work, it is exhausting, but it is so worth it.

So what will 2018 bring for you?

As always, if you are interested in coaching, please contact me at aveshaempower@gmail.com or visit our Contact Us Page



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