Stop being overwhelmed by life

“Love the life you live, live the life you love.”

– Bob Marley

Life can be overwhelming for a lot of us.

Jobs, homes, kids, dogs, friendships, relationships, etc. At times it may seem as if there is never an end to the things you have to do every day. Sometimes I wake up and it feels like ground hog day. That exact feeling is why I have created the best morning routine that helps me hop out of bed and start my day. Granted, I am an extreme morning person (yes, I am dead tired by 8pm), you do not have to be a morning person to enjoy getting out of the bed in the morning. A simple, but effective morning routine can change, everything.

For a number of people these responsibilities aren’t only overwhelming, they are paralyzing and instead of tackling their to do list, they accomplish nothing at all. If you are one of these people, don’t feel bad, you are not alone, many people struggle with having too much on their “to do list”.

Below are a few of my personal tips I use to manage my day to day life so that it doesn’t become overwhelming. Having raised two very busy and active boys solely by myself, physically and financially and through this experience I learned right quick that there are things that NEED to get done and then there is everything else. I learned to manage my time (and theirs) in a way that did not overwhelm me…all the time.

Disclosure: Admittedly, I am a neat freak with a hatred of clutter and disorganization so…for me to not feel overwhelmed there were things I HAD to handle that others may feel they could let go of. My point is, we are all different and what overwhelms some of us might not overwhelm others. So be thoughtful of what makes you feel accomplished and what frustrates you and then think about what you can let go of.

  1. Create and Implement a morning routine – I cannot stress enough the importance of a morning routine. How you start your day sets the stage for how your entire day will unfold. Baby steps are OK here…you can implement small changes at first until you get to your desired routine.
  2. Only take on what you can handle – say no once in a while, you don’t always need to be the one to volunteer. If your mind is saying NO but your mouth is saying YES then its clear you are not comfortable saying no, even when you need to. Something to be conscious of, are you a people pleaser?
  3. Set boundaries with people – you decide what works for you and what doesn’t. You are the Director of your life.
  4. ALWAYS make time for self care – self care and self love is the single most important thing you can do for yourself in this lifetime. This is by far my favorite topic to talk about, write about and coach people on. Self care isn’t selfish, its simply you putting yourself first so you are able to be there for others. Self care means taking 15 mins each morning to stretch, drink some coffee, wake up and organize your thoughts. Self care is taking a bath at the end of the day when all the dishes are done, kids are in bed and lunches are made. Self care is taking a walk in nature on Sunday morning to decompress from a long week.
  5. Your marriage comes before your children, nuture that relationship
  6. Let go of what is not critical and move that task to the next day
  7. Create and prioritize a task list
  8. Make time for enjoyment – find time to be silly. Once a week make a date with your husband, kids, a friend or yourself and just do something that is fun. Paint, go to a comedy club, host a dinner party and play games, whatever brings out your playful side…do it.
  9. Tackle what you need to and move on – do not get stuck on what you can’t get done, celebrate what you DID get done.
  10. Make time for exercise – I could talk about exercise all day long. Exercise is a critical component to true and deep happiness and feeling good about yourself. There are many different avenues you can take with exercise. Go for a walk, hike, do yoga, stretch, take a class, whatever you enjoy…do it.
  11. Plan and cook meals ahead of time – something I struggled with was having enough time to prepare meals. So I started cooking on weekends for the week and in addition I started preparing my breakfast the night before. Grateful for overnight oats and smoothies!!
  12. Ask for help (lean on others for support)
  13. Carpool (school, sports, etc.)
  14. Clean the kitchen at night so you wake up to a clean space
  15. Go to bed early so you can rise early
  16. Rise early so you can tackle the day refreshed and with a clear mind
  17. DO NOT HIT SNOOZE
  18. If you are suffering from anxiety or depression, get help – don’t go it alone
  19. Surround yourself with the things you love – it is a fact that when you are surrounded by beauty and the things you love, your mind settles
  20. Self motivate by making your tasks fun
  21. Involve your children and create chores for them! its good for kids to feel invested
  22. Take a break from life at least once a week, do something special for yourself – go on a day trip, have a girls day, take your kids to the park and have a picnic, take a hike, do something out of the norm and embrace it.

I hope you can identify with a few of these tips if not all and embrace them. Incorporating small changes in your life can make such a difference. Even if you identify with only one of these tips (right now), one small change can make such a difference.

If you would like to chat and discuss where you struggle, what you can change, how to make a morning routine, etc. Please contact us anytime at AveshaEmpower@gmail.com

In addition if you feel this article would be helpful to someone you know who struggles with the every day stress of life….pass this article along and kindly share on your social media pages. My goal is to help people who struggle find solutions to make life a little easier.

Namaste

Fitness Over Forty – get balanced

Hormones got you down?

Feeling like you are on a constant roller coaster?

PMS a thing for you?

Time to try a few things to get you balanced and in a good place, physically and emotionally.

I suffer terribly from PMS – or whatever they call it now. I know my body so well I can predict almost every symptom I am going to feel and when.

It all starts about 10 days before my period is due (although its always late, which I am now able to predict). My symptoms starts with agitation, then some anger, a whole lot of anxiety and then I finish it off with some weeping and sobbing 🙂 Sadly this is not something I can control, the emotions seem to just take over. However, the good news is that I recognize the onset and am able to work through most of these feelings and keep them at bay with the following:

  1. Yoga, Pilates and Barre – mat exercises are literally a cure for PMS bloat and emotional rollercoaster rides. The floor exercises help to bring down inflammation. Belly breathing helps with the anxiety and getting the heart rate pumping with some low impact pilates and barre moves help to get the endorphins kicking. A good session over 20 minutes will bring immediate relief.
  2. Change your diet – cutting back on alcohol, sugar and salt and adding more protein, fruits, and raw veggies can help prevent inflammation and of course…a morning smoothie is a fantastic way to start your day. Adding supplements such as a B Complex, Magnesium and EPO (evening primrose oil) can also reduce PMS symptoms.
  3. Cardio – however you can – do it! Take a walk, bike ride, hike, jog or swim. Cardio gets the heart rate up and kick starts your metabolism as well as your endorphins which help combat the emotional rollercoaster feeling as well as the bloating and fatigue.
  4. Get more sleep – as you start to hit peri-menopause your sleep cycle will starts to change and can even become erratic. It is important that our bodies get a restful nights sleep. Try meditation before bed. Implement a no screentime before bed rule (to avoid mental stimulation) and do not eat or drink anything after 7 pm to avoid your body having to metabolize. In addition, there are many good yoga sequences that help put your body in relaxed state which will prepare you for sleepy time.
  5. Have sex – yep, its true, sex can help with bloating and cramping…look it up!
  6. Reduce your stress – however you can, you must get a handle on your stress level. Don’t take on more than you can handle. Set realistic expectations of yourself and others and take time out of your schedule for YOU and only YOU every day!
  7. Keep a journal which tracks your cycle – this will help you know what to expect and when. This is how you stay sane 🙂

I hope these tips are helpful to you as you navigate your journey to a more balanced life.

Contact me at aveshaempower@gmail.com if you would like to set up a coaching session.

Have some of your own tips on how to balance your life a bit? I would love to hear from you below 🙂

Think this info would be helpful to someone else, please share on your social media pages. Spread the word and maybe we will help someone else.

Fitness Over 40 – Get up and get moving

If fitness isn’t your thing but you are so tired of feeling..well…tired and you lack motivation, energy and drive to do anything. Your clothes don’t fit right and you are growing tired of feeling like crap then its time to make a change. You don’t have to love fitness to get in shape, you just have to commit to a fitness program that works for you and your lifestyle.

It is a myth that in order to exercise you have to join a gym. That is complete garbage. You do not have to go to a gym to work out (unless of course you want to). I haven’t belonged to a gym in years. I do Pilates, Yoga, HIIT and Barre right in the comfort of my own home. I go for walks, runs, hikes and bike rides (weather permitting) and I do this all without setting foot in a gym.

In my experience with coaching people on fitness, the first steps need to be small ones. The most important step is that you need to set obtainable fitness goals.

Example of an obtainable fitness goal:

Start with taking a walk. Shoot for a half hour walk 3x a week. Then increase, either by adding a day or adding more time to the duration of the walk. Make it fun by creating a walking playlist or asking your friends to join you. You can do it in the morning, during the day at lunch time or coffee break time or after work/dinner. Wherever and whenever you can fit it, do it. Walk the dog, walk the baby in a stroller, walk to a friends house, it doesn’t matter…just get moving. Adding incline over time will help increase your metabolism and help build muscle.

Set the habit!

Next, after you have established an exercise routing, which usually takes about 26 days for something to become a habit. Then you naturally will want to start eating better, or maybe even stop smoking, or drinking but trust me when I say, setting healthy keystone habits will automatically make nasty habits disappear.

Once you have established your fitness and nutrition pattern you will need to stick to it. If you have to miss a day, make up for it by adding a little more time to your routing the next day. The goal is not to miss more than a few days otherwise you risk falling off the wagon and bad habits will start to develop. It is so easy to fall back into old negative habits because its comfortable and easy and sometimes you are happy just laying on the couch eating pizza and drinking wine. But remember how awful those things make you feel after a week of no exercise. All your progress will be down the tubes.

Don’t fall off the exercise wagon!

So if you are looking for a little motivation, would like to do some virtual personal training or you would like to pursue coaching with me contact me anytime day or night. I am here to help you make your fitness goals a reality

Anxiety

– The only way over it, is through it! –

Anxiety is a fear based emotion and/or feeling.  It is the feeling of a lack of control.  However, it can exist only if we feed it.

We feed anxiety by either by living in the past and wishing for a different outcome or by trying to predict or control the events of our future.

On a very basic level anxiety is a lack of trust in ourselves and the Universe.  A worry of what is to come.  An inability to process and accept the past.  It is the action of trying to prevent a certain outcome by driving it a certain way (not trusting the Universe).    It is a lack of forgiveness of others and Self.

Anxiety = fear

The anecdote for fear is to trust Self and the Universe.  We need to stop trying to control the outcome and allow the magic of the Universe to unfold.  We spend so much time trying to steer the events of our lives and dictate where we think they should go, that we end up missing the magic of where it could lead us.  We need to trust.

Anxiety will not subside on its own.  We must resolve the underlying fear or trauma before the anxiety can start to dissipate.

  1. We must dig deep and explore our past and present Self;
  2. We must let go of what we are trying to forget (but can’t);
  3. We must let go of what we fear to lose;
  4. We must not try to run from it, hide from it, nor should we feed it or mask it and expect it to go away.

We must look at anxiety/fear as if we are holding on to a very short rope.  Holding on to this rope is exhausting, draining and it is emotionally killing us.  However, this fear of letting go of the rope has become our lifeline and a way to avoid the unknown.

Letting go of that rope IS scary, however, letting goes frees you and allows you to BE!

  • Be you
  • Be happy
  • Be free
  • Be strong
  • Be loved
  • Be content
  • Be empowered
  • Be still
  • Be safe

JUST BE!!!

How do you get rid of the anxiety?

Let go of the rope!

  1. have faith – find your spirituality
  2. create a blank slate/fresh start – the life of your dreams
  3. live a clean life
  4. exercise
  5. do the right thing
  6. don’t keep secrets
  7. listen to and trust you intuition
  8. surround yourself with happy people
  9. do not run from your problems
  10. stop self medicating
  11. ask for help
  12. see a counselor/coach/therapist
  13. talk through your fears and issues
  14. feel your feelings
  15. confront childhood trauma
  16. feel – cry – repeat
  17. learn to trust yourself
  18. figure out who YOU are
  19. give up all vices (drugs, alcohol, food)
  20. enjoy the moment for what it is
  21. be in nature
  22. journal your thoughts and feelings
  23. express gratitude
  24. fall in love (with yourself and others)
  25. surround yourself with peace
  26. remove physical and emotional clutter
  27. remove those that are toxic from your life
  28. create a self care routine

Sadly I spent most of my life (starting at a very young age) living in an anxious state.  This is a horrible way to exist.  It wasn’t until I worked through my childhood trauma, abandonment and fears that I started to notice the anxiety lessen until it eventually disappeared.

I also learned coping skills to help me work through those horribly anxious moments (triggers can cause deep anxiety).  Gratefully I am able to reach into my tool belt to find the best tool to ward off the anxiety before it takes over.

Once we accept the concept that we, ourselves, actually feed the anxiety with our very own thoughts (and worry), we are able to work to change our mindset and start focusing on the positive.  Another way to ward of anxiety is to get involved in something you enjoy so you are able to change your mindset before your mind starts taking over with negative thoughts (read Grounding exercises to ease anxiety and the stress of daily life).

If you would like more information on how to work through anxiety or would like to schedule a coaching appointment, please contact us Coaching

Love, light, laughter and peace

Avesha

 

 

 

 

How to practice self love daily

How do you start your day?

~Life is an endless process of self discovery~

Self-love is not a trend, it is not something you do when you feel like it.  You don’t just “do self-love” after a break up or after you experience trauma.  Self-love is a life long practice that needs to be added to your every day life. With self-love comes the releasing of negative thoughts and self-criticism by embracing more of a loving and positive acceptance of yourself through forgiveness of yourself and others.

The Universal concept is that our thoughts create our actions and therefore those thoughts dictate the outcome in our lives.  Self-love is a very powerful and necessary practice and critical if you want to have healthy relationships with others.

Self-love is not selfish!

Taking care of and loving ourselves and being a whole, sound and emotionally healthy person allows us to take care of others without it feeling like a burden. If you aren’t taking care of yourself, if you don’t rest and relax your soul, then you will be of no help to others— especially yourself.  You will eventually feel drained and eventually there will be nothing left to give.  You must give to yourself as well as give to others.

Below is a a simple self-love checklist that may seem overwhelming to you at first, however, I promise that if you commit to adding a majority of them into your daily routine or practice as I like to call it, every single day, you’ll see the benefits immediately.

45 Ways to Practice Self-Love

  1. Create a quiet and safe zone in your home (may it be a corner, a closet, or a spare rom and deem it your “space”)
  2. Buy yourself fresh flowers (or cut them from your garden and display them)
  3. Grow a garden of fresh vegetables
  4. Start an exercise routine (yoga, pilates, the gym, take a walk) – increase those endorphins (see Creating a workout routine you can and will stick to)
  5. Read, take a nap, listen to music, sit quietly – please just rest your soul
  6. Buy yourself some new makeup and play with it
  7. Create a daily bucket list and post it
  8. Repeat the following mantra “I love and accept myself”
  9. Make a list of all the things you like about yourself
  10. Create a gratitude journal (see How to start Journaling – Keystone Habit)
  11. Start your day with meditation and yoga
  12. Implement a “treat yourself day” (mine is Friday)
  13. Dress nice, even if you don’t have to, put on those earrings, scarf and lipstick and show the world how beautiful you are
  14. Take a breath between your bites of food and savor the taste
  15. Make yourself a hot cup of coffee or tea and savor each sip
  16. Have a protein or collagen smoothie every morning
  17. Sleep at least 7 hours a day
  18. Say no and be ok with it
  19. Pay it forward, always
  20. Make someone feel good whenever you can
  21. Smile often, even if no one is smiling at you (they may think you are weird but that is ok)
  22. Eat food that is nourishing (put down the boxed food – unless its treat day)
  23. Get a massage and have them use essential oils
  24. Go for a hike or long walk in nature
  25. Be confident (walk and talk with confidence)
  26. Learn something new – dance classes, yoga, tennis lessons, start or join a MeetUp group
  27. Host a ladies night
  28. Call a friend and laugh for hours about nothing (no complaining)
  29. Spend time with your kids before they grow up and move away 😦
  30. Get a new haircut and/or buy some new makeup
  31. Eat chocolate guilt free (maybe on treat day)
  32. When someone offers your a compliment, simply say, “Thank you”
  33. Travel solo
  34. Set a no screen time in your house (dinner, after 9, etc)
  35. Set goals (see Improve your life with these simple Keystone Habits)
  36. Take a day off and do something nice for yourself (go to the gym, coffee shop, shop, meet a friend for lunch, take a walk, sleep)
  37. Self-love mantra: “I am enough. I have enough. I do enough”
  38. Let go of what no longer serves you
  39. Buy a diffuser and infuse essential oils like lavender
  40. Write a letter to yourself and put it away for a year
  41. Host a dinner party
  42. Hire a coach or a counselor (see The real benefits of working with a Life Coach)
  43. Take a hot bath with Epsom salt and lavender (or whatever your favorite oil is)
  44. Make new friends (and remove those toxic ones)
  45. Clean out your closet and donate clothes you no longer wear

The biggest message I have is, be gentle with yourself and always honor where you are at every stage of your Journey.

The best advice I have been given – ever is to ~feel your feelings~

Namaste’

Contact Us if you would like to work with a coach to help you kick start your self-love and self care routine!

How do you start your day?

“Every day we are born again” – Buddha

Over time and by creating daily KeyStone Habits you can learn to transform your life into the one you deserve.  For this, I like to use the term – stepping stones.  Every little step you take brings you one step closer to your new and healthy life.

With stepping stones you literally take each and every day, one step at a time.  It takes self awareness, inspiration, determination and the drive to want to change and the commitment to stay on task (and focused) as you begin your new Journey.  I know, because I have done this work and although there were times I wanted to quit, I am so grateful I didn’t.

It takes 26 days for a habit to become a lifestyle.

There are so many ways to begin making little but impactful changes in your life. Personally I found that starting with a morning routine was the best place to begin my Journey to an emotionally healthy lifestyle.

Thankfully I am a morning person so creating a morning routine was easy as well as exciting for me.  This routine is very important to me as it provides me with much needed structure and it gives me something to look forward to each day as I rise in the morning.  This positive start to my day gets my head in the right place so I am ready to tackle my day with a clear mind and a peaceful soul.

I am grateful for this practice and I continue to alter it to adjust to life’s little changes and challenges.


Below are some”morning ritual” ideas to help you create your own daily practice –

  • Wake up with the sunrise (“early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise” – Benjamin Franklin, famously)
  • Drink a glass of room temperature water (with lemon if you can – fantastic liver cleanse)
  • Intermittent fasting
  • Walk the dog / get on the treadmill (I don’t care how cold or hot it is, get that body moving)
  • Make a collagen smoothie – google smoothie recipes for some awesome ideas
  • Brush your teeth, wash your face, give yourself a mini facial or at least a detox scrub (I have some fantastic organic facial recipes to share)
  • Do at least 20 minutes of yoga stretches or if you are feeling bold do a 30 minute power yoga session 🙂
  • Start an exercise routine
  • Make a hot cup of coffee or tea – drink it slow and savor the flavor 🙂
  • Meditate for at least 5 minutes (download the Simple Habit, Calm or HeadSpace app for an easy guided meditation) – or just sit in silence as you drink your tea/coffee/smoothie
  • Practice grounding and earthing
  • Peruse your garden and cut fresh flowers for your home – assuming you have a garden, if not, steal your neighbors flowers and put them in a vase (LOL, kidding, well, kind of)
  • Write in your journal (express your gratitude, set your goals, write down your worries and let them go) – Don’t know how to journal or where to begin?  start here
  • Read your gratitude list out loud and thank the Universe, God, Buddha, whatever you believe in for another beautiful day in this life
  • Take a hot shower and be in the moment (you can also take a hot bath with Epsom salt and lavender before bed to wash away the day)
  • Get ready for your day (do your hair, put on makeup)
  • Dress to impress (even if you work from home – yoga pants are not pants)
  • If you commute, put on your favorite music or audio book – enjoy the time you have to yourself

Its just as easy and important to create an “evening wind-down ritual” as well (Contact Us for ideas to create your evening ritual).

Until soon!

Namaste

Fitness Over 40

There is no better time than right now to start a fitness routine!

Fitness over 40 is a program I have created which involves exercises for each individual person, over 40, based on their fitness goals as well as their body type.

Together we will create a targeted and, as I stated, an individual fitness and nutrition program which will focus on all areas you wish to work on as well as enhance them and of course we will focus on those stubborn areas that may need a little more work 🙂

Our bodies change with age and therefore your fitness routine needs to be realistic based on your age and body type.

For instance, a lower impact, targeted resistance exercise program is much more effective for a body that is over 40.  High impact exercises do not offer the same results.

Unfortunately, high impact exercises (like running) break down the body with little positive results.  They also can result in an injury to our muscles, tissues and even bones if we are not careful.  So something like Crossfit can be dangerous and is known for many issues like muscle tears.

So a good exercise routine should consist of an hour of cardio multiple times per day, 5 days a week with some resistance exercises, light weight training and a 20 minute yoga routine.  This is a much more effective workout and provides proven results over a longer period of time vs. going to the gym daily and pounding away on a treadmill or spin class.

Example:

Morning:  Walk 25 minutes either outside or on treadmill; do 15 minutes of yoga stretches and some light weights (multiple exercises/multiple reps)

Afternoon:  Take a lunchtime walk before you eat (starts the fat burn process)

Evening:  Go for a walk / jog, or use the elliptical; do a 25-40 minute resistance or boot camp routine; end with 20 minutes of yoga stretches

Doing this 5 – 6 days a week will change your life

Again, the workouts will be tailored to your fitness goals and those stubborn areas you wish to work on.

Example:

  • if you are looking to strengthen your core, we will create your routine to accomplish this with strict core exercises mixed with some resistance training and light weights.
  • want to tone that butt of yours, we will work in a number of squat exercises with a fantastic Barre routine.
  • need to lengthen and tone as well as get a good work out?  Power Yoga/Barre is your modality.

We will work together, as a team, to get you started on your fitness goals which will also include a comprehensive nutrition program as well.

No, you do not have to buy special meals or supplements from me.  We will simply talk about healthy eating habits as well as what supplements may be right for you (you will purchase them when and where you are happy doing so).

I specialize in living a healthy and empowered life and in my experience you accomplish this by being a whole healthy being…emotionally, physically and spiritually.

Balance!

Contact us today!